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92 Swine Flu: It’s a Beta! (2009-04-26)

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0:00:39JCD in Netherlands, ACC in San Francisco at crappy hotel
0:03:14Swine flu top of US news, worry over ACC’s head cold, only Mexicans dying, ACC: “I think it’s a beta test”; early February Panasonic order for workers’ families to return to Japan in fear of “new influenza strains”, JCD: “they’re gonna give us a flu vaccine for four flus and then they’re gonna have the fifth one they’re gonna release and they’re gonna kill everyone”, 25-45 kill age range, one case in New York City; Wales on high alert, “Exercise Taliesin”; Monsanto pig theories, H1N1 bird vs swine, infowars.com laboratory theory; JCD on two previously-effective medications replaced by Tamil & Relenza not covered by insurance, Tamiflu possibly losing effectiveness, excuse for stockpile dump
0:16:33Rotterdam “mosquito” high-frequency repellant system for loitering teens, JMD hearing constantly-squealing new brakes
0:19:58And Now Back to Real News: sleazy AVN Awards, Best New Starlet Stoya thanks “each and every person who jerks off to my smut”; KPIX on fat people exacerbating global warming; Washington Post on woman almost arrested for post-Caesarean “hoping for girl” comment
0:29:05Producer note on linguiƧa & chouriƧo in Massachusetts; Italian mafia’s $170bn in yearly profits, loan sharking and Chinese knockoffs, JCD’s fake Rolex collection, ACC’s refusal to send watch through TSA X-ray, avoiding shoe scans; millimeter wave patdown avoidance lie, “welcome home Mr. Curry”, incompetent drug dog
0:41:01Barney Frank in 2005: “not the degree of leverage” in home ownership, “you’re not going to see the collapse that you see when people talk about a bubble”, JCD: “he’s a visionary”; producer note urging return to one show per week; tweeting porn stars, Craigslist-Twitter hooker system; JCD called out by son for admitting to liking Family Guy; Village Voice letter from reader on “Nazi Pentagon experiments in Queens” with aircraft electronically zapping people in their homes, high incidence of brain tumors, ACC: “I don’t write those guys off”
0:56:52ABN AMRO bank claims Rijksmuseum’s Rembrandt self-portrait; JCD story: Chinese knockoff Rembrandt, incompetent Mona Lisa copies; both banks filing preemptive lawsuits; ACC recommends Stedelijk Museum; producer photo of Manhattan NYPD “sniper towers”
1:02:26ACC looking for footage of Al Gore lying to Congress about personal profits
1:05:40Donation Segment: $1081 breathalyzer theory, ASCII “look listen look” sum
1:14:24Monsanto farmer suicides in India; Obama administration at 100 days; Merck’s doctor hit list in stroke-causing Vioxx class action lawsuit, CEO now on Microsoft board, ACC: “what about the peanut butter guy, what happened to him?”; ACC’s upcoming speech at New Jersey school, mtv.com “ruined the internet”; cross-continental vs domestic connection quality
1:22:29JCD’s itinerary, Queen’s Day party night before, chalking up flea market real estate
1:25:22Outro: JCD gripes about 16GB Compact Flash card errors, flash memory vs hard drive MTBF; ACC’s GPhone guides him to defunct Circuit City to buy netbook