Call Clooney!

745 Unicorn (2015-08-06)

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0:00:00JCD: “Twenty kids were killed!” (0:20:41)
0:00:33Three North Carolina preppers arrested, milsurp FBI informant; PayPal cancellations
0:02:54War on Crazy: Nashville Airsoft “active shooter” Vincente David Montano, Pooper: “it shoots BBs”, two cops right around the corner, PIO cites Mad Max twice, “the officer saw the trigger being pulled”, CNN: “gunman opens fire”, “you hear multiple rounds there”, cop: “at this time we’ve not located the firearm”, backpack “hoax device”; theater recording device bans
0:15:48Handcuffed eight-year-old with ADHD, nine-year-old girl with “ADHD”, NBC edited package on “twenty incidents causing death”, CNN on 2011-2012 70k restraints, 75% with disabilities, “calm down” screech evergreen, JCD “these kids need more drugs” theory
0:26:17Trump sons Cecil-shamed; Zimbabwe lion woes; airline trophy bans; Cecil Beanie Baby
0:30:02Planned Parenthood Executive V.P. on unedited videos: “this has been a strategy to deceptively edit in inflammatory ways … claim that they’ve put out the full tape”, fifth video out, ACC: “in full length, these are dynamite!”; terminating due to race or gender, “we don’t want to know”; Josh Earnest “yeh” to Tapper on full video availability, “a rule that this administration has not just followed but actually supported”, Tapper: “somebody at the White House should maybe watch the videos in full”; Ben Carson “sucker punch” for Tapper: “I thought that they were able to get all those things based on Obamacare”; new “no no no” jingles
0:47:00Producer Segment: ACC on Chicken Dance in Belgian discos
0:56:54Air Wars vs US civilian droning estimates: 459 to 2; State Department human rights report delay; dual MH17 investigations, Dutch Safety Board’s Peter van Vollenhoeven the masher, Russian ambassador on tribunal vote timing; State Department to RT’s Gayane Chichakyan: new sanctions unconnected to veto, “no specific date or anniversary … we do this all the time”, JCD recommends Rain vodka; State Department in “close consultation” with Congress on defending anti-ISIL forces in Syria, producer: US policy turning against Kurds, Jaish al-Fatah rebels, Richard Engel on launching strikes from Incirlik Air Base; “master bomber” al-Asiri cover blown over op-ed, “new generation of underwear devices” (CotD), surgically implanted explosives meme, vs ISIL: “they don’t have the same type of network on Twitter”
1:26:41“Sexist” air conditioning, “it is men who control temperatures”, “emergency cardigan”, Google Nest ads, JCD: “gay couture” to humiliate men; Glenn Beck “where is the media?”; Lenny Kravitz’ “Penisgate” on The Today Show: “men, apparently, see this differently” (ACCPPotD)
1:43:54KQED on bicycling in San Francisco, JCD on deserted bicycle paths, “getting hit all the time”
1:49:13Drunk or not drunk Greta Van Susteren “presidential cannits”, “breocracy” (CotD)
1:54:11Donation Segment: $52.80 mile-high club
2:08:30Humiliating Independent Journal Review videos: Cruz Simpsons impressions, “machine gun bacon”, Graham phone destruction video, Carson “Operation” game, Jeb Bush Sharknado “I’m culturally illiterate”, stumbling “I’ll take you outside” T-shirt clip, “half a billion dollars for women’s health issues” gaffe; IJR owned by strategy company Media Group of America
2:20:59Unicorn watch; Trump capitalizes on released phone number; Kelly Osbourne: “if you kick every Latino out of this country, then who is going to be cleaning your toilet, Donald Trump?”; breast pump “you’re disgusting”; Trump call with Bill Clinton, “conspiracy theories”
2:31:52MSNBC on Clean Power Plan announcement moved indoors, “too hot”; Obama: “overwhelming scientific consensus”, “smog gets worse”, “harmful carbon pollution”
2:37:37MH370 flap: “we’re looking at every ass”