Call Clooney!

555 Grays+Monkeys=Humans (2013-10-10)

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0:00:00JCD: “Look at what Audrey’s doing, yeah, she’s pullin’ a train!” (0:41:04)
0:00:37JCD tambourine returns; CVC’s musician girlfriend’s theremin; JCD Otamatone battery dead
0:04:58Leif Erikson Day, Friday the 11th Illuminati killing day, Taiwanese 10/10 parades
0:07:49North Korean luxury ski resort Masik Pass; JCD on warm orange juice in Suzhou
0:12:34Lousy reporting on;, Oracle Super Bowl debacles; “the Obama administration has declined to release any numbers …”; Jay Carney: “I’m glad you asked that question” on signups, “it’s an aggregation process”; Kayak meme on NewsHour; Wasserman Schultz: “to be insisting on data … is a little bit unfair”, “servers” designed for 50k visitors per day, JCD: “how are they supposed to sign all these people up if they’re anticipating only fifty thousand?”, Jack Lew: “it’s the wrong question”; Sebelius: “we’re facing the end of Western civilization by having a market-based strategy”
0:35:50NSA Utah facility power surges; 40k horsepower nuclear-powered sub; Navy submarine orgy
0:41:30ACC’s Master of the House earworm problem on Seinfeld; version
0:43:09Producer Segment:
1:04:48National Geographic Channel’s cyber attack American Blackout trailer
1:07:08Janet Yellen a midget with an annoying voice like old lady in Poltergeist
1:09:47European Public Affairs blog on recommencement of TTIP talks vs shutdown; TPP is a go
1:12:36Putin critic Mikhail Kosenko’s indefinite incarceration in psychiatric hospital; Gay Crusader’s white paper progress report
1:17:04Government shutdown: Lagarde’s new Hillary haircut, “failure to raise the debt ceiling would be far worse”; insiders with call options on stock market; Ask Adam: FAA has to approve aircraft sale? Barbara Mikulski: “don’t we want to reopen CDC?”, “many people don’t know that they’re disease detectives”, “disease identification SWAT team”
1:27:27Obama on al-Libi raid: “where you got active plots … we’re gonna go after them” (CotD); Lisa Monaco’s porn name, give it up for Raven!, not answering questions on NewsHour high on the “um-ometer”, JCD: “douchebag of the decade”, “captured … in a very professional raid”, “tools … in the toolbox”
1:43:10OECD Survey of Adult Skills reaction: “we’re dumb”, adult education and manufacturing automation, “literacy, numeracy, and problem solving in technology-rich environments”; second report on need for carbon taxes
1:57:26“Worst Russian announcer ever” on Euronews
1:59:36Bob Geldof at One Young World Conference against vuvuzela backdrop: “there will be a mass extinction event”, “it is in our interest to have the poor with us producing things”, “the scientists of the world said we may not get to 2030”
2:05:07Donation Segment: $111.11 “makin’ it rain” donation
2:22:54Producer e-mail on theistic Satanism, Satan the Gray, JCD: “Hey, how ’bout some donations then from Satan, cheap bastard”; Aleister Crowley
2:32:19Haitian class-action cholera lawsuit against UN; Kayak a Chicago outfit
2:34:04Producer feedback on antidepressant combos, Connecticut submarine base using ELF, Abilify the most-prescribed; neuroleptic malignant syndrome; Lucille Ball’s filling antenna
2:40:18Argentine President’s skull surgery: “her head is her biggest asset”
2:41:07Chinese hornet attacks; Monsanto to receive World Food Prize in agriculture
2:43:31Brazilian protests: chaos and looting; Polish, Greek pension grabs; 2017 predictions