Call Clooney!

313 Hide Your Forks (2011-06-16)

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0:00:00JCD: “She stole the silverware!” (0:53:03)
0:00:33Vivek Kundra resigns for Harvard professorship, ACC predicts venture capital position
0:02:49KTLA breaks for breaking news of Nancy Pelosi with no Anthony Weiner news
0:04:47“A Gay Girl in Damascus” blogger outed as married white American Tom MacMaster
0:09:09ACC’s two-hour NPR road trip “like I was living in the Ministry of Truth” with “Plasticine” megafauna, breaking news of report to Congress with list of White House talking points
0:15:21Elusive 32-page DoD document with MANPAD “man-portable air-defense system” threat assessment, JCD: “hey, I’m coming over to my man pad, honey!”, transitional government “legitimate interlocutor”, price tag a paltry $1.1bn; Obama’s actual letter to Congress citing September 2001 Public Law 107-40 AUMF rather than War Powers Resolution red herring
0:33:17Producer Segment: JCD on David Brooks The Social Animal coin toss technique
0:49:33Japanese researcher creates “poop burger” from soy sauce and human excrement; John’s Gonna Hum the Sunday Times jingle; Michelle Obama’s San Francisco dinner with plasticware, disappearing hotel silverware in Marbella Spain; “Barack” soliciting donations for dinner lottery; Michelle in LA for ICarly agitating for more stories about military families
0:57:37Obama on SelectUSA Initiative cost savings like electronic Federal Register, “the truth is, no one reads this thing”, “apparently the government used to overnight containers filled with nothing, don’t ask why that is”, pulling the plug on The Fiddlin’ Foresters website, JCD: “what’s it cost, five dollars??”, Biden in charge of program “because nobody messes with Joe”; Congressional picnic banjo players; to Ann Curry: family “not invested” in presidency
1:12:47Russia Today on Pentagon’s missing $6.6bn sitting on pallets for Iraq
1:15:34And Now Back to Real News: Mark Rylance’s “walking through walls” Tony award speech
1:21:47Rep. Darrell Issa grills ATF weasel on his signature on Operation Fast and Furious letter with false statements, 27 pages of solidly redacted documents, DoJ weasel refuses to answer “who authorized the program?”, ACC: “it was the autopen, it’s obvious!”, ATF supervisors retaliating against whistleblowers; ACC’s grandmother’s Watergate cassette tapes for his mother, JCD on recent history of “stooges” in Congress covering for White House (JCDPPotD)
1:34:01Donation Segment: NPR’s Dina Temple-Raston refuses to be recorded at YWCA speech
1:44:15John King’s inane “coke or Pepsi?” Republican debate questions; Bill O’Reilly avoids Ron Paul’s poll numbers; “Fed shill” Herman Cain, ACC on left-wing hate for Bachmann & Palin
1:55:27Public Law 107-40 saber-rattling for Syria; Angelina Jolie to visit Syrian refugees in Turkey; NorAm Intelligence spots US activities; JCD proposes messing with NATO & NPR on Twitter
2:05:22Ask Adam: fighting “transphobia” in schools in accordance with California law; JCD story: amused by “full-blown cussin’ type Tourette’s” on plane, CDC TS Awareness Month
2:11:13Producer note on TSA agents distrusting scanner safety; FBI “heads of media” terror warning
2:14:12Anti-college meme from Jeffrey Immelt, Obama blames unemployment on ATMs and airport kiosks, SelectUSA for GE; Kenny Britt wanted for driver’s license “inaccurate statements”
2:20:26Obama at jobs forum: “shovel-ready was not quite as shovel-ready as we expected”
2:21:36Brian Williams finally reports on Greek riots; Pimco cofounder: US debt nearly $100T
2:24:28Upcoming TSA unionization vote; Missouri nuclear reactor on shaky ground
2:25:41Bill Gates: “vaccines are magic”, Gardasil for Rwanda, insulin “vaccine”; 14th bird flu death in Vietnam; French national charged with child pornography in Phnom Penh; Weiner resigns
2:29:54Skype ad with photo of woman about to eat a kitten