Call Clooney!

295 Poledancing for College (2011-04-14)

Show 295 album art
0:00:00ACC: “I am going to homeschool her with a stripper pole, and just move straight, just move straight…” JCD: “So she can go straight to college!” (1:59:36)
0:00:37In the morning to “feet in the air”; ACC’s 5:30am wakeup
0:02:04Ashley Judd chosen to be Hollywood Congo spokeshole, ACC: “where does Angelina buy her kids?”, Judd to Chris Matthews: “I’m a big fan of the Clinton Global Initiative”, Rethinking Refugees committee, scripted “80% of all refugees worldwide are girls… are, are women”, “this is more fun”; to be joined by Charlize Theron; Ban Ki-moon’s wise “invest in women”
0:12:35Jay Carney mistakes Syria for Libya; Ron Paul on Geithner’s debt limit “apocalypse”: fearmongering “very similar to saying that Saddam Hussein had a nuclear weapon”, “they gave the depression to the people who lost their homes”, new members of Congress powerless
0:21:57Producer Segment: ACC postmortem “smoke me!”
0:36:00#blackout over New Zealand’s new file sharing legislation, idiot MP Katrina Shanks claims to be computer “sayvvy”, “it takes a bit from this box, and a bit from that box, and a bit from that computer”, “it’s really important to remember that file sharing is actually an illegal activity”, “quite different to copyright, where someone sends you a file, that’s different again”
0:47:55Rick Santorum: population growth not at “replacement level” to support Social Security, addressing homeschoolers’ conferences; five Mississippi counties rounding up homeschoolers
0:54:11Dr. Robert Lustig labeling all forms of sugar including HFCS as toxins
0:58:20France considering outlawing prostitution, ACC: Champs-Élysées “tranny central”
1:01:06Pulitzer rumors for NPR tweetmonger Andy Carvin, Washington Post: ACC as “media critic and vet­eran technology blogger”, objections distilled down to two sentences
1:06:47Non-blonde new Russia Today hottie on State Department techno-expert training camps and “panic buttons”, US military fake account generators, 5% of Libyans with internet access vs barrage of tweets clamoring for US intervention, ACC: “Andy, make sure you retweet it!”
1:14:52Donation Segment: NPR ad network; Matt Taibbi article on college loan scam (JCDPPotD)
1:34:04CNN’s John King blathering at top speed about Taliban, ACC: “magnetized brain influence”; 1999 European Parliament document: “military research is ongoing on environmental manipulation as a weapon, as demonstrated for example by the Alaska-based HAARP system”; Coast to Coast AM on auroral effect lavender sky near Fukushima, points finger at China or Russian “Woodpecker” ELF; Rep. Peter King trying to steal 70cm amateur radio band
1:44:33Another Atlas V launch from Vandenberg with classified NRO payload
1:46:33Trains Good Planes Bad: Frank Lautenberg’s S.371 FREIGHT Focusing Resources, Economic Investment, and Guidance to Help Transportation Act, JCD: “nudge nudge wink wink”
1:48:39Viagra patent expiring in 2012; US planes dropping bombs in Libya in spite of assurances from Robert Gates, “defensive airstrikes”; David Axelrod whines excuses for Obama’s failure to shut down Guantánamo Bay: “there is this institution … called the United States Congress”, “we wanted to close Guantánamo”; Pentagon having “second thoughts” about Iraq withdrawal
1:57:08Negative effects of school Head Start Programs; O’Biden falls asleep during Obama speech
2:04:55Donald Trump “a great job if I run, and if I win”, JCD: “red herring” with birth certificate
2:06:36Producer note: Cisco VP Gary Bridge all-in on chipping schizophrenia patients; IRS precrime software; Sydney “if you see something say something” signs; proposed topless sunbathing ban
2:12:18Judge rules for “I Heart Boobies” bracelets; Seattle high school renames Easter eggs “Spring spheres”; mother pushed aside by TSA groping her six-year-old; end-of-show Donald Trump