Call Clooney!

1349 Wappie (2021-05-23)

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0:00:00ACC: (Untransliteratable) (1:03:43)
0:00:34Italy wins Eurovision Song Contest with “bad ZZ Top” 1970s throwback, 56-country European Broadcasting Union, celebrity “professional judges”, “Boaty McBoatface” audience voting, ACC vows to resurrect comedic voiceover, UK punished for Brexit by finishing dead last
0:14:21ACC irked at lack of “scratch and vax” title for New York City lottery; Georgia judges reducing community service in return for vaccination, “every shot is a service to the community” (CotD); “everybody loves incentives!” in Colorado, ACC notes celebrity shaming opportunities; White House partners with long list of dating sites excluding Grindr; Molly Wood marvels at “genius move” capitalizing on FOMO; maskless sushi dinner with former New York banker
0:26:02NTD on protests against Rutgers vaccination mandate; OSHA washes its hands of side effects claims; semi-believable swollen tongue in Newsletter; Dr. Ezekiel Emanuel to NPR on relaxing of US-EU travel restrictions, ACC irked by negative test provision in fine print, “herd immunity or whatever” air quotes; Anthony Fauci does another 180° on vaccination target; Fauci’s unscientific “next month or so”, JCD story: order-of-magnitude miscalculation at Standard Oil, “the exact trigger point of the number or the percentage of people”, “the possibility of the eventuality that we may need to boost people”; good cop bad cop with Pfizer CEO on CBS, “the city is going to the community” code for “footage of black person imminent”; NBC “as the US races to reach the hesitant”, JCD critiques Pfizer marketing strategy of mentioning boosters at all; CBC compares vaccines to luxury cars; Johnson & Johnson “one and done”
0:54:16Sweden discontinues PCR testing; latest version of NHS contact tracing app blocked by app stores; Simparica Trio dog antiparasitic disclaimer; pharma advertising boom traced to 1985 & 1997, revolving-door Biden adviser Dr. David Kessler; relief funds allowing large hospital chains to scarf up competitors; Sadiq Khan: “over six million Londoners have now received a dose of the virus”; TikTok “we will get to play together when it’s done” (CotD)
1:09:17Wappie label bestowed on ACC after appearance with Dutch radio host Robert Jensen
1:11:31Producer Segment: Troll Count! and Trust the Science! jingles videos attacking American Airlines, Coca-Cola, and Nike over their woke politics: “religious minorities were ripped from their families, sterilized, sold to factories”; Biden at scripted appearance with South Korean president: everyone in the US wants the COVID-19 vaccine, contemplates “protection of the entire world”, anti-Trump COVID-19 Hate Crimes Act for Asian-Americans; Biden “open, secure, G5 network” gaffe, incoherent “I think that, y’know” rambling, “rebuild the Gaza”; Biden acronym butchery compilation
2:05:18Blood banks rejecting vaccine-laden plasma; “The Drug that Cracked COVID” author Michael Capuzzo begs M5M to stop suppressing ivermectin, ACC envisions M5M ransomware attack
2:14:10Fulton County Georgia unseals ballots for physical inspection, ACC: “the Democrats are evil!”; NPR moans about sale of News Tribune Publishing Company to hedge fund, JCD notes blue-wrapped New York Times “so you can identify the local wokes”, “give us free money!
2:31:47Producer notes on New South Wales mouse plague; predictable wave of outrage from PETA
2:36:30Wow!” iso from Sharyl Attkisson at story of Jimmy Carter being denied access to UFO records by George H.W. Bush; 60 Minutes drones on and on about USS Nimitz Tic-Tac incident, JCD on database of unclassified CIA reports, ACC on Project Blue Beam NWO religion theory
2:55:40Donation Segment
3:09:06Cork pop “wow!” iso combo; John Fletcher No Agenda Morning Zoo audition