Call Clooney!

1326 Freedom Bracelet (2021-03-04)

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0:00:00JCD: “Oh, you’re talking about … woman’s appearance, woman’s appearance!” (0:43:50)
0:00:38Happy Inauguration Day for the true Trump believers; CNN asks panel of QAnon survivors what their loony family members think, ACC disappointed at absence of wild NESARA theories; NPR on elevated security due to “possible plot” by unnamed militia group and/or QAnon “the umbrella term for a set of disproven and discredited conspiracy theories”, “false belief” in return of Donald Trump; plans for 1,000 new Capitol police officers; Glenn Greenwald gripes to “Frau Ingraham” about militarized security; ACC’s “trained to shoot and to kill” neighbor; FBI director Christopher Wray: no evidence of Antifa posing as Trump supporters, new term “militia violent extremists”; John Brennan and Nicolle Wallace commiserate about how horrible Republicans and white men are; unlistenable NPR host Mary Louise Kelly murmurs about unprecedented stand-down order for National Guard, JCD: “this was a set-up!”
0:20:53Joy Reid channels Oprah and Beto O’Rourke clutches his pearls in response to Gov. Greg Abbott’s reopening plan for Texas; CBS propagates “bodies stacked like firewood” meme, “all the reported variants” erupt in Houston; South Dakota NPR features terrified Austin mask Nazis; psychotic selfie-snapping mask zombies at ACC’s spin studio, social distancing all but forgotten; NPR All Things Considered celebrates 44,000 deaths in Texas
0:34:41Anthony Fauci and Face the Nation host Margaret Brennan carefully avoid addressing Gov. Kristi Noem’s hospitalization statistics, Brennan throws in Noem’s face “sanctity of life” and Sturgis Motorcycle Rally “that she held”, JCD notes Brennan’s descent into unattractiveness, Scott Gottlieb lies “we were treating it literally with Pepcid and hydroxychloroquine” prior to July 1; South Dakota “I’m on meth” PSA revisited
0:47:59New Zealand PM Jacinda Ardern promises “a full two-week period of sustained propaganda”; “I can make you appoi-ment, no problem” Chinese vaccine phone sketch; Michael Osterholm attributes lack of influenza in children to “Mother Nature”; Justin Trudeau: “today we’re taking another hysteric… historic step forward”; ACC shuts off Golden Globes in disgust
0:58:2233-50% of South Africans uninterested in coronavirus vaccine; “black and brown” vs elderly in UK excess death numbers, JCD: “they want to kill the old people”; Austin CBS report on ER visits and hospitalizations due to vaccine side effects; Ben Stein reports “wild side effects” from second Moderna shot; doctors agitating for federal “vaccine holiday”; Dolly Parton updates Joline; producer “Bad Chad” Christian’s shingles and colleague’s type 1 diabetes; Catholic Church opposing Johnson & Johnson vaccine due to its more direct link to aborted fetal cell lines; Team Halo’s Dr. Kat recommends “the first vaccine that’s available to you”
1:16:55EU copying Israeli “green passport”; Pfizer CEO Albert Bourla using Israel as Petri dish; Rapeh Party representative Ilana Daniel complains about “medical apartheid”; Israeli pilot program for 10-day home quarantine with “freedom bracelet” tracking device; Wall Street Journal report on AOKpass app as part of $20bn vaccine passport market; Johnson & Johnson to begin testing on newborns and pregnant women
1:27:12“Heavenly Farts… Heavenly Father” prayer; KQED’s local talent of limited vocabulary
1:31:29Producer Segment: designated artist Darren O’Neill
2:06:54Small Texas power companies facing bankruptcy in wake of ERCOT scam; Harley Schlanger lays crisis at the feet of Rick Perry and “deregulation run by monopolists”
2:13:00“Spicy white” former Evergreen College professor Bret Weinstein throughly pummeled by Clubhouse woke crowd, Moe Factz analysis of original white supremacy under European royalty and initial marketing of Clubhouse as black platform; Weinstein relates how “a coup took place”; telling “listen, white man, we’re in charge here”
2:28:58Weepy Andrew Cuomo channels Joe Biden with repetitive sexual harassment non-apology, unspecified “important lesson”, ACC: “this is a Hollywood takedown”
2:40:39Microsoft joins C2PA Coalition for Content Provenance and Authenticity with Adobe and BBC to combat pirac “misleading content”, minicomputers vs mainframes, ACC reminisces about MTV teleprompter scripts, JCD: “nobody wants to hear that their Wang’s no good”
2:57:26Donation Segment
3:13:28Dr. Seuss erased from Read Across America Day, JCD’s upcoming Substack column; Dr. Seuss Enterprises dumps six books due to “racist and insensitive images”, JCD irked at cancellation of “nerd” origin If I Ran the Zoo, ACC fumes at “breaking of American culture” by Biden administration, JCD on New York Times’ 1940s-era enthusiasm for Japanese internment camps
3:21:34Alex Jones “it’s all over!” isos, “it’s all over, man, all over, enjoy!” rant revisited