Call Clooney!

1321 Doctored Evidence (2021-02-14)

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0:00:00ACC & JCD: (giddy laughter) (1:00:35)
0:00:36ACC delighted at the use of supercuts by Trump impeachment defense; CBSN’s low-budget Lana Zak and Trump lawyer Michael van der Veen squabble over “doctored evidence”, “I want to be clear for our viewers!”, JCD: “everything we get is nothing but doctored evidence!” (JCDPPotD); new Adam Curtis documentary Can’t Get You Out of My Head; Trump defense “reportedly” compilation, “it is exactly as reliable as I Googled this for you
0:15:06Compilation of Democrat objections to 2016 election results; producer’s list of historical precedents for Capitol protest; Andrea Mitchell mocks Trump lawyer Bruce Castor; CNN “sources behind the scenes” claim Trump opposed “stay peaceful” tweet, JCD: “what??”, Brolf: “important point indeed” (BCotD); Jake Tapper redefines cancel culture; “does a politician raising bail for rioters encourage more rioting?” question for the defense; douchebag Don Lemon moons over Virgin Islands Del. Stacey Plaskett griping about defense playing clips of black women, “that is why he must be convicted and acquitted … and disqualified” mic drop botch
0:31:02JCD notes “CNN’s reign of terror is over” with Zucker’s timely departure; rumors of Andrew Cuomo acting at the behest of nursing home investment lobby; Lincoln Project implodes due to sex scandal; Steve Pieczenik discusses ongoing “sting operation” with Infowars
0:42:16Dan Andrews blames “hyperinfectivity” of UK variant for eluding PCR; calls for investigation into Cuomo lying about nursing home deaths, JCD: “this’ll be the first guy that’s indicted after getting an Emmy”; papers on virulence of COVID-19 variants based on rat studies; CDC vaccine death toll at 653; NHS issuing DNR orders for patients with learning disabilities, JCD: “death panel!”; CDC terrorist color coding scheme for reopening schools; The Osterholm Update: COVID-19 podcast issues dire “Hurricane COVID” warning; Spirit Airlines “we are government officials” threat revisited, ACC: “the pigs can stand on their hind legs”
0:57:01Inappropriately chuckling Bill Gates whines to The Indian Express about “evil theories” about him and Fauci, “do you stop anti-vaccine misleading things from being promoted” on the internet, “my expertise is in vaccines nowadays” lie, “unnatural” internet anonymity, JCD on Gates’ reclusive post-pie behavior and bulletproof glass due to angry Lake Washington boaters
1:17:51Inappropriately chuckling Savannah Guthrie and Anthony Fauci discuss double masking, ACC irked at ageist “explain it to my mom” meme, Fauci lets slip “the vaccine is preventing her from becoming physically ill”; ACC’s sister-in-law positive four weeks after second Moderna shot; UK expects normality to return in 2022, producer note on 56 Norwegian nursing home deaths as business as normal under socialized medicine, mink-to-human transmission in Poland
1:35:34Justin Trudeau remarks on “the threat of these new variants that are being developed”; America This Morning claims doctors wanted to put Trump on a ventilator; JCD PBR interlude
1:40:10Producer Segment: ACC drools over $10,000 Neumann U47; HIVE blockchain technology
2:36:52Judy Woodruff’s questionable pronunciation of Myanmar /ʤən.tə/, ACC: “it’s Yudy!”; TikTok feta video and recent China-EU geographical indications agreement; Time issues assurance that China is not building a time machine; story about cyberattack on Tampa water treatment plant running Windows 7 as native ad or planted story; fawning NewsHour report on sketchy OTF Open Technology Fund with gratuitous hit piece on former USAGM head Michael Pack and Falun Gong; 2011 Hillary Clinton “internet in a suitcase” revisited; Zuckerberg unaccountably off the hook for Myanmar situation
3:01:16Indian farmers staging months-long “biggest protest in human history” over minimum pricing legislation, Rihanna paid $1.5M to tweet, Greta Thunberg posting talking points; local report on study linking climate change and migration of coronavirus-laden bats in Southern China; chemtrails vs lockdown-induced global warming; The Verge declares war on natural gas, JCD gripes about Washington State’s efforts to discourage use of gas, ACC’s $30 monthly gas bill
3:25:51133-car pileup near Dallas, ACC on 80-kilometer chain reaction pileups in the Netherlands
3:27:55Rumblings of a new ebola outbreak in Eastern Congo mining area
3:29:35Noodle Gun: KPMG executive Bill Michael ousted over “complete and utter crap” comment about unconscious bias; Tokyo Olympics President Yoshiro Mori resigns after complaining about women taking too much in meetings; ACC on the dangers of being in “show mode”; ACC reads resignation letter from slimy Biden press aide TJ Ducklo
3:36:59Donation Segment
3:52:42“I Googled this for you!” iso; producer note on use of Howard Zinn’s books by homeschoolers, JCD: “you know who we call communists? communists”