Call Clooney!

1311 Woke Kindergarten (2021-1-10)

Show 1311 album art
0:00:00JCD: “Baseless, baseless, baseless!” (0:46:17)
0:00:36No Agenda survives yet another round of deplatforming thanks to the Dudes Named Ben and timely AWS exodus, ACC declines Parler “gold badge” offer, JCD: Jack Dorsey being bullied by his SJW employees; Anderson Pooper and Brian Stelter gleeful at Trump’s failed attempt to use @POTUS account and Google’s Parler ban; fired CISA head Chris Krebs to Don Lemon: “good first step” taken by Silicon Valley to “hold people accountable”, Krebs’ “new firm” devoted to cybersecurity consulting; ACC identifies “Nazi wing” seeking retribution
0:20:24Chris Cuomo urges Biden administration to target “Retrumplicans”; Pooper apologizes for his unhinged post-riot screed mentioning Olive Garden; NBC News: Twitter monitoring planning of further mayhem “on and off Twitter”, SJW staffers “so proud” to work with easily bullied company; Black Information Network’s Mo’Kelly cites “Trumplicans’ attack on the Capitol”, “you don’t get to escape the permanent stain of this”; JCD explains peculiarity of TNT NBA Tip-Off rolling out ominous music for “domestic terrorists” piece; Forbes editor and food writer Randall Lane threatens to leave no stone unturned in smearing businesses that hire former staffers of “Liar in Chief” Trump
0:42:58ACC fact-checked on previous show’s VAERS statistics; teachers’ association note offers resources for class discussions of Capitol “insurrection” and “baseless” election claims, National Education Association president Becky Pringle blusters about “danger to Americans and American democracy”, JCD notes return of Trump Rotation, patronizing “note to black teachers”, further resources to be found at “Woke Kindergarten” on the YouTubes
0:54:14Unhinged rant from Keith Olbermann invokes 9/11 and “live in infamy” memes; obstruction of Congress and sedition charges for rioters; Fox News sheds light on 25th Amendment as CNN cites “sources”, oxymoron of “snap impeachment” with Senate in recess, idiot Pelosi calling for actual military coup, JCD on fear of Trump “declassifying like a madman”
1:03:35Tucker Carlson’s impressive editorial taking newly-woke Republicans to task; Association of Flight Attendants union proposes denying “freedom of flight” to protestors, ACC on Reichstag Fire false flag as Nazi pretext for attacking communists; Carlson identifies “the main problem” in the GOP as its “intra-white loathing” disdain for its own voters, ACC: “it’s truly the elites versus the regular Joes”, “too many elites” problem in Ancient Rome, JCD on the 21st Century “billionaire boom”, ACC reflects on billionaires as “total assholes”, Elon Musk’s free pass due to his military industrial complex ties, Jack Ma “at the bottom of the Wong Dai River”
1:18:37Goosehead Insurance fires employee identified as Capitol protestor; Minneapolis local station KARE issues memo prescribing use of “rioters, extremists, an angry mob” instead of “protestors”, “well-respected resource for journalists” Kneeland Project nonprofit urging use of “illegal insurrection” and “mob made up of many white supremacist groups”; Rachel Maddow mocks “New World Order” conspiracy theories, followed by real-life “New World Order” compilation, JCD threatens to turn himself into Henry Kissinger with Ventolin cough syrup
1:28:50Parler executive Amy Peikoff to “Cutter” Carlson on Apple’s deplatforming of “very nicely functioning piece of software”, ACC irked at perception of web browsers as “my Google”, Carlson: “how much of the world’s kiddie porn goes through Gmail?”; AWS ToS suspension notice to Parler taking issue with “violent content” mitigation plans; Prof. Juliette Kayyem to NewsHour on potential national security implications of riot, ACC notes Rep. Rashida Tlaib’s look of terror when confronted by peasants with pitchforks; Facebook deplatforms “hateful and threatening” #WalkAway Campaign and its gay white founder Brandon Straka
1:47:26Producer Segment: JMD warns against getting two dogs at once; JCD Champagne tips
2:31:56In-progress Austin snowstorm thanks to global warming; CDC and New York Times throwing Deborah Birx under the bus for claiming that the UK COVID-19 variant is present in the US, JCD: “they’re pulling back for Biden”; ABC News resurrects debunked “asymptomatic or pre-symptomatic” spread meme; CBS News: hospital beds now “in short supply” in Los Angeles “where a person dies every eight minutes”, JCD’s seasonal flu headlines in the Newsletter; Queensland Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk promises to “go hard and go early” against UK strain, “think of it as a long weekend at home, if we do not do this now it could end up being a 30-day lockdown”; “another 1,700 people received the virus today” in Colorado
2:45:56Vaccine distribution spiraling out of control with push for six shots per vial; Fauci irked by Biden transition Operation Warp Speed “turbo drive”; producer note on healthcare workers reacting to second shot with severe diarrhea; Maricopa County Arizona using stadium for mass vaccination site; Queensland Facebook page: “yes, you must wear a mask in your vehicle”
2:55:26Power blackout in Pakistan, recycled 2015 video of Vatican blackout with conspiracy theories about arrest of Pope on Pedobear charges; WGN Chicago mocks “intelligent man” Sidney Powell; Dominion CEO to Axios on reasons for singling out Powell, JCD identifies old Silicon Valley trick of getting one sacrificial defendant to settle out of court
3:05:45Donation Segment: Fisting Nuts
3:19:54Biden “the press is bad” iso; Kamala Harris accused of stealing MLK “fweedom!” story for Elle and cackling C-SPAN interviews; Hari Sreenivasan: crashed Sriwijaya Air Boeing 737-500 an “older version” of the 737 Max, ACC irked by irrelevant “26-year-old” detail