Call Clooney!

1252 Agitprop (2020-06-18)

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0:00:00ACC: “You gotta look at this right now, quick before they take it down!” (0:01:15)
0:00:34JCD obliged to “kill the Kayleigh segment” due to echo “glitch” believed by some to be proof of sabotage; botched attempt by Lincoln Project’s Rick Wilson to cancel Domino’s Pizza
0:04:00Pasta Glock jingle and more upgraded Noodle Gun sound effect; Quaker Oats pulls the plug on Aunt Jemima after New York Times article, producer note on Haribo removing racist black licorice, Oreos in jeopardy, ACC reminisces about cereal box 45 rpm records; Lady Antebellum changes its name to Lady A without regard for Seattle blues singer by the same name; CBC Kids News runs scripted attack on J.K. Rowling over “transphobic stuff”, Hachette noodle kids threaten Rowling’s new book The Ickabog, ACC Red Book: repentance from a remorseful Rowling; #RIPTacoBell viral video of Taco Bell employee fired over BLM mask: “it’s not that it’s a problem with me, Denzel, it’s a company thing!” (CotD), JCD: “heads must roll!”
0:18:44Oklahoma State coach Mike Gundy apologizes for OAN shirt, internal strife at Los Angeles Times, Steam gaming platform under fire for keeping quiet because of “angry white male gamers”, ABC took too long to cast its first black Bachelor, Colin Kaepernick now on Medium board, Formula One squabbling, Boy Scouts of America to require diversity and inclusion badge as Eagle Scout prerequisite, ACC: “it’s insincere!”
0:25:10Harvard Prof. Charles Lieber indicted for fraud in Chinese espionage case; Tim Cook’s virtue signaling “poised to move forward in a great leap” reference to Cultural Revolution; Joshua Philipp to Epoch Times American Thought Leaders on Department of Education investigating Chinese influence with Lieber as “the tip of the iceberg”, Chinese “three warfares doctrine”, China Daily now registered as CCP foreign mission, contrast with outrage over Russian election influence, “Liaison Department” charged with political warfare; Mayor Steve Adler’s 2016 trip to China sponsored by Texas Growth Fund and “lavish holiday” in January 2020; Philipp on Soviet-style “ideological subversion” tactics like drug warfare with fentanyl and control of Hollywood; “struggle session” public shaming used during Cultural Revolution, China unable to control information its own citizens are receiving, Dimension A & B psychological warfare
0:43:36Fox News muddying the waters with footage of Atlanta police shooting Rayshard Brooks; partial walkout of Atlanta police after announcement of murder charges by anti-taser prosecutor; Teen Vogue celebrating Karl Marx; Zoom admits to suspending activists at China’s request
0:50:53Steve Adler whines to NPR about the law “conventional wisdom” preventing him from passing mask mandate amid “surge”, gets in a jab about “communities of color”; Fauci admits he and CDC lied about masks to keep them in the hands of doctors, “actually the circumstances have changed” lie; Fauci’s wife Christine Grady confirmed as vaccine exemption rubber-stamper; douchebag Jerry Nadler refuses to allow maskless Republicans to speak
1:05:05The New Abormal podcast hosted by fake Republican Rick Wilson and witch-voiced socialist Molly Jong-Fast introduces Sleeping Giants’ Matt Rivitz who took on The Tucker Carlson Frozen Fish Racism Hour and Frau Ingraham’s White Power Hour, JCD: “this was done by the right wingers years ago”, victory lap for Kellogg’s and Mars, ACC: “have you never seen Al Sharpton??”, “you want brands to come out and not be in favor of racism and not be in favor of disinformation”, Wilson labels Fox “the Mount Everest of right-wing racist agitprop”, Jong-Fast interjects a spurious “the racism!” during analysis of Trump’s ad-libs
1:22:30JCD’s newly-returned next-door neighbors looking like zombies after Florida lockdown; Wilson and Jong-Fast compares Trump’s “stoking racial hatred” to Sharknado Part 19, “Sandals Chlamydia Beach Bahamas” slander, “alt-right minions” vs “anonymous Twitter handle” hypocrisy; Variety piece on Fox News’ reallocation of advertising time slots; Sean Hannity’s immunity to targeting and his family ties to the FBI; Rick Wilson “delicious toxic slurry” Trump hate compilation; JCD scratching his head at liberal hate for police unions
1:38:47Producer Segment: JCD agrees to co-host Who Are These Podcasts
2:23:27ACC’s control misfires due to new studio table
2:24:42Arab and Chechen drug gangs at war in Dijon France, JCD recommends French’s Dijon and Canadian Grey Poupon mustard, ACC’s mustard-equipped Rolls Royce Silver Shadow II in the Lincoln Tunnel; rising tensions between North and South Korea after destruction of liaison office; NPR on Hong Kong head Carrie Lam cheering on takeover by China
2:32:09Fox News’ Martha MacCallum trolled by CHAZ “anarcho-syndicalist commune” tweet quoting Monty Python and the Holy Grail
2:34:22New coronavirus outbreak in Beijing; boots on the ground report from Shanghai producer; Biden raves about the “foresooable future” and “successible accountable recovery”; blogger implicates TIAs temporary ischemic attacks, ACC on his father’s history of TIAs
2:40:21Democracy Now on arrest of Steven Carrillo in “far-right Boogaloo Movement” murders of police officers; Southern Poverty Law Center offering $30M to shadowy NGOs to boost voter registration, ACC perplexed by Black Lives Matter Foundation’s conduit into ActBlue
2:47:33CNN resurrects 25th Amendment meme for Trump’s careful descent of ramp at West Point; schism within Catholic Church highlighted by letter from Archbishop ViganĂ² to Trump; JCD on the lookout for prototype for demonic photo of Greta Thunberg
2:54:21Scott Adams’ challenge to find concrete example of systemic racism in the US
2:56:50Donation Segment
3:13:56Biden “folks, here’s the truth” and “the opposite is true!” isos; PG&E confesses to 84 cases of involuntary manslaughter in 2018, ACC: “who gets the chair?”
3:16:30FDA withdraws emergency authority to use hydroxychloroquine in spite of successes at hospitals like Houston United Memorial; CBS briefly airs Jon LaPook saying “it seems to work”
3:20:21ACC predicts more MMT money to prevent deflation and a checkmark recovery in stocks
3:22:58Democracy Now on new outbreaks in Beijing, India, Pakistan, and Australia, 450,000 cases “could have been prevented if states had mandated the wearing of facemasks”