Call Clooney!

1041 Hairy Mary (2018-06-10)

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0:00:00JCD: “Yeh-yeh-yeh-yeh-yeh!” (1:34:01)
0:00:32JCD describes “bionic eye” cataract surgery; ACC “return to Reddit” trigger warning
0:09:13Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade suicides: “encouraging news” of National Suicide Prevention Lifeline calls up 25%, ACC irked by “demons” meme; Bourdain’s girlfriend Asia Argento and Harvey Weinstein, JCD’s HAG Hillary Assassination Group; Spade doorknob technique
0:21:01Producer Daniel unearths redacted portion of Marc Marin’s rereleased 2011 WTF Bourdain episode: “Chantix … that makes some people stabby, or suicidal” (CotD), Chantix ad “suicidal thoughts or actions”, ACC: “some form of … pure SSRI, that is telling your brain, hey, you don’t want cigarettes, you wanna kill people”, unintended consequences of changing RSS feeds
0:29:54Producer notes on Rapid DNA “swab in, answer out” technology; massive backlogs in sending data to NIBIN National Integrated Ballistics Information Network; Chantix vs Malarone
0:38:50Trump on G7: “we have a world to run!”, CNN’s John King “watch the handshake!” with Justin Trudeau; MSNBC millennial summarizes trade deficit as “we send little pieces of paper with writing on them around the world”; Trump “you can tell that to your fake friends at CNN”, EU “brutal” to US, “the gig is up”; 270% tariff on milk except the ultra-filtered variety for Greek yogurt, previous leaders “missing in action”, “sir, you’ve got a plane to catch”
0:54:47Trudeau rejects sunset clause, announces $4bn for women’s education, JCD: “plodding, plodding virtue signalling”, plastics charter “reducing the cost associated to plastic use”, “culture of lifelong learning”; Belmont Stakes fanfare; ABC on Trump “leaving tension in his wake”, Russia’s “illegal annexation of Crimea”; Trudeau twists Trump’s national security comment
1:08:51Hysterical Joy Reid panel pile-jumps Trump Rotation, “he did not not look well to me”, “oddly languid”, “I think he came off like an idiot today”, “Mad King Donald”; Juncker “rules-based international order”, “there might not be a country for them to inherit” (BCotD)
1:15:58Producer Segment: ACC an HQ Trivia answer; “waifus and waffles”
1:33:53Trump predictions for meeting with Kim Jong-un, “many people right now in Shanghai”; 1957 NBC radio “want ad” for president with $100k salary; ABC on potential invitation of “one of the world’s most brutal dictators” to White House, Martha Raddatz spins Kim as shut-in with “no blemishes allowed” bodyguards; “quite an impressive day” and “mental!” isos
1:47:34Furious Mika Brzezinski on Trump’s porn complaints, “they made my blood boil, I was shaking when I heard them”, Stephanie Ruhle “it’s a bad day for humanity” iso; David Frum on Nord Stream 2 and Russian ability to supply Germany and “turn off gas to Poland”
1:59:29JCD fast-forward for ABC Queen Elizabeth’s “Trooping the Colour” event report (CotD)
2:01:33ACC: media freaking out over New York Times journalist’s affair with Senate Intelligence Committee official and media wiretaps; Geert Wilders at Free Tommy Robinson protest; millennial FiendZone podcast host on new global warming-inspired “eco-horror” genre
2:08:10JCD’s robotic National Hearing Center hearing aid marketing call, ACC in the market
2:11:48Donation Segment: ACC’s Twitter royalties debate with Jason Calacanis
2:23:26JCD’s dim view of school laptops; Google Education Suite blocking non-Google search, textbook-free Striving Readers program, PBIS Positive Behavioral Interventions and Support “individualizes consequences based on culture, race, and background”, poverty as brain damage (CotD); PBIS “behavior is a skill” promo; Bill de Blasio on opening up specialized high schools
2:35:30Prof. Jordan Peterson on job options for low-IQ workers, JCD: “it’s a Hail Hairy Mary”
2:41:56Newark recruiting residents to spy on each other with HD security cameras